NakedFaerysThoughts

A post in which nakedfaery hits herself on the head for being a dumbass

It wasn’t my intent to be victim blaming, but I really see why it came across that way.

To make things clear:

-I don’t think being sexually harassed is something that attractive women should feel they deserve or feel grateful for.
-I don’t think her being pretty excuses the guy for being a piss poor excuse for a boss. He was an unprofessional oaf and should have been challenged. But I do not think, not for one fucking second, that most people who aren’t white, cis, able bodied and attractive would get away with pulling this shit for a second without some comeback.

My main issue is with all the attention it’s getting. And yes, the act pissed me off as a bitter, cynical, ugly woman who has lived most of her life in poverty.

Maybe she doesn’t realise she’s pretty, maybe she’s never used it to her advantage. I will say that if I’d ever been in a workplace where attractive women didn’t fully use it to their advantage to get ahead, then I’d probably have felt differently.

I really WANT not to feel bitter towards attractive women, I really do. I’ve come to terms with a lot of the beef I have with people for other reasons, and I’m trying this one. It’s hard when you live in a society that values attractiveness above all. Attractiveness gets you ahead, whether you intentionally use it or not. If I walked into a job interview, all 200lbs of unattractive me, and then a 130lb beautiful women interviewed for the same job, I do not think for a second that I would get hired. This is what privilege is though, it’s realising that being white or cis or able bodied or straight can get you ahead, whether you manipulate it or not.

Sexual harassment absolutely should be tackled from a male focused perspective, in the sense of radically altering their behaviour and perceptions.

But we cannot pretend that there aren’t people who don’t use their privilege to their advantage. Their financial privilege, their looks, their gender. It’s naive to think it doesn’t happen.

However, I suppose this woman I don’t know doesn’t deserve the brunt of my wrath about how many people are unemployed, about how many people can’t afford to quit their jobs, about how many people won’t even get hired because they’re ugly or trans or disabled.

The stuff I’ve been seeing about her today just exemplified everything I feel about privilege, about how people don’t open their eyes and realise what being white, able bodied, cis and beautiful does for them. I’m sick of living in a body negative, ugly negative, cissexist, fat phobic, transphobic and ableist society and it triggered me.

Rant over. I think I suck at apologising.